X-23 wrote

I'm 22.

September 4th, 2015 - My mom wakes up complaining of a terrible headache. My mom and I brush this off, as migraines run in our family. Later in the day, I took my mom to get my brother prescriptions. When we got to the pharmacy my mom opened the door to get out, she took one step out and froze. I said "momma", nothing. A little louder "momma, what's wrong?" Her reply "I just feel weird". By this point I knew something was wrong. I told her "If you don't get back into the truck, I'm going to call 911". As soon as I said this, someone my mom worked with pulled in next to is, she acknowledged my mom, and instantly knew something was wrong. She picked my mom up and put her in the truck. By this point my mother was slouched over on her left side. All I could think to say was "Momma, I love you", as I drove to the E.R. she responded "I love you too". We got her to the E.R. I waited what seemed like hours, which was only minutes for a security guard to come and get me. I followed him, and I could tell it wasn't good with how quickly he was moving. He escorted me to the trauma unit, where a doctor came from behind a curtained room, walked directly to me and said "Your mother has had a massive stroke." My world fell apart, he told me "That a doctor in Jacksonville, Fla., had accepted her as a patient. The helicopter is on it's was now, I suggest you start heading to Jacksonville." I absolutely refused to leave that hospital until my mom was on the helicopter. Seeing my mom on the ventilator was terrifying. I held her hand, and talked to her, my forehead against hers until the helicopter crew came to take her away. The nurses, brother, and myself prayed before the crew left.

On our way to Jacksonville, it stormed. Just as we got into Jacksonville, the was a rainbow perfectly positioned over the city. Somehow I just knew my mom was going to be okay by seeing that rainbow. Later that night, around 9 P.M. my mom was out of surgery, and the surgeon told us "it couldn't have gone better." The stroke left her completely paralyzed on the left side. She stayed in the hospital two weeks, I never left her side. After the left the hospital it was a series of rehabilitation hospitals, I visited her every weekend. She came home the day after Thanks giving. I was her primary care giver, I put my life on hold, so that I could keep my mom out of a nursing home and take care of her, at home.

August 16th, 2016 - My mother suffered a second massive stroke. She was once again flown to Jacksonville to her surgeon. I was told "The bleed is significant, her brain is very swollen, and has shifted positions. I can operate to save her life, but she will never been the state she was in prior." Prior to the second stroke she was confined to a wheelchair, or sitting/laying down most of the day. He continued, "I want you to think of what she would want, If I operate, her quality of life will be very poor. She will most likely be bed ridden for the rest of her life. She may never speak, or open her eyes again. We can make her comfortable..." I made the decision to take my mom off of the ventilator, and have her pass peacefully.

August 18th, 2016 - My mother passed away peacefully with my brother and myself on each side.

I miss her terribly each day. I wish it could have be different. But I know my mom wouldn't have wanted that surgery. The surgeries terrified her. She struggled with anxiety and depression after her first stroke. I talked to her until the moment every indication of life was gone. I still talk to her. I have a journal, I write to her when I get upset.

I know she's better now, and when I see her again she wont be in that wheelchair, she won't be in pain, she won't be anxious, depressed, or scared.

She was my best friend. I was a complete mommas boy. I love her so much.

Stay strong. I mean it. If you need anything, if you need to talk, vent, anything, I'm here. Your mom loves you. She's watching you. She's with you wherever you go, and whatever you do. Make her proud.

X-23 wrote

I'm 22.

September 4th, 2015 - My mom wakes up complaining of a terrible headache. My mom and I brush this off, as migraines run in our family. Later in the day, I took my mom to get my brother prescriptions. When we got to the pharmacy my mom opened the door to get out, she took one step out and froze. I said "momma", nothing. A little louder "momma, what's wrong?" Her reply "I just feel weird". By this point I knew something was wrong. I told her "If you don't get back into the truck, I'm going to call 911". As soon as I said this, someone my mom worked with pulled in next to is, she acknowledged my mom, and instantly knew something was wrong. She picked my mom up and put her in the truck. By this point my mother was slouched over on her left side. All I could think to say was "Momma, I love you", as I drove to the E.R. she responded "I love you too". We got her to the E.R. I waited what seemed like hours, which was only minutes for a security guard to come and get me. I followed him, and I could tell it wasn't good with how quickly he was moving. He escorted me to the trauma unit, where a doctor came from behind a curtained room, walked directly to me and said "Your mother has had a massive stroke." My world fell apart, he told me "That a doctor in Jacksonville, Fla., had accepted her as a patient. The helicopter is on it's was now, I suggest you start heading to Jacksonville." I absolutely refused to leave that hospital until my mom was on the helicopter. Seeing my mom on the ventilator was terrifying. I held her hand, and talked to her, my forehead against hers until the helicopter crew came to take her away. The nurses, brother, and myself prayed before the crew left.

On our way to Jacksonville, it stormed. Just as we got into Jacksonville, the was a rainbow perfectly positioned over the city. Somehow I just knew my mom was going to be okay by seeing that rainbow. Later that night, around 9 P.M. my mom was out of surgery, and the surgeon told us "it couldn't have gone better." The stroke left her completely paralyzed on the left side. She stayed in the hospital two weeks, I never left her side. After the left the hospital it was a series of rehabilitation hospitals, I visited her every weekend. She came home the day after Thanks giving. I was her primary care giver, I put my life on hold, so that I could keep my mom out of a nursing home and take care of her, at home.

August 16th, 2016 - My mother suffered a second massive stroke. She was once again flown to Jacksonville to her surgeon. I was told "The bleed is significant, her brain is very swollen, and has shifted positions. I can operate to save her life, but she will never been the state she was in prior." Prior to the second stroke she was confined to a wheelchair, or sitting/laying down most of the day. He continued, "I want you to think of what she would want, If I operate, her quality of life will be very poor. She will most likely be bed ridden for the rest of her life. She may never speak, or open her eyes again. We can make her comfortable..." I made the decision to take my mom off of the ventilator, and have her pass peacefully.

August 18th, 2016 - My mother passed away peacefully with my brother and myself on each side.

I miss her terribly each day. I wish it could have be different. But I know my mom wouldn't have wanted that surgery. The surgeries terrified her. She struggled with anxiety and depression after her first stroke. I talked to her until the moment every indication of life was gone. I still talk to her. I have a journal, I write to her when I get upset.

I know she's better now, and when I see her again she wont be in that wheelchair, she won't be in pain, she won't be anxious, depressed, or scared.

She was my best friend. I was a complete mommas boy. I love her so much.

Stay strong. I mean it. If you need anything, if you need to talk, vent, anything, I'm here. Your mom loves you. She's watching you. She's with you wherever you go, and whatever you do. Make her proud.

EDIT: I apologize for some spelling and grammar errors. This was emotional.

xGFX wrote

X-23 wrote

I'm 22.

September 4th, 2015 - My mom wakes up complaining of a terrible headache. My mom and I brush this off, as migraines run in our family. Later in the day, I took my mom to get my brother prescriptions. When we got to the pharmacy my mom opened the door to get out, she took one step out and froze. I said "momma", nothing. A little louder "momma, what's wrong?" Her reply "I just feel weird". By this point I knew something was wrong. I told her "If you don't get back into the truck, I'm going to call 911". As soon as I said this, someone my mom worked with pulled in next to is, she acknowledged my mom, and instantly knew something was wrong. She picked my mom up and put her in the truck. By this point my mother was slouched over on her left side. All I could think to say was "Momma, I love you", as I drove to the E.R. she responded "I love you too". We got her to the E.R. I waited what seemed like hours, which was only minutes for a security guard to come and get me. I followed him, and I could tell it wasn't good with how quickly he was moving. He escorted me to the trauma unit, where a doctor came from behind a curtained room, walked directly to me and said "Your mother has had a massive stroke." My world fell apart, he told me "That a doctor in Jacksonville, Fla., had accepted her as a patient. The helicopter is on it's was now, I suggest you start heading to Jacksonville." I absolutely refused to leave that hospital until my mom was on the helicopter. Seeing my mom on the ventilator was terrifying. I held her hand, and talked to her, my forehead against hers until the helicopter crew came to take her away. The nurses, brother, and myself prayed before the crew left.

On our way to Jacksonville, it stormed. Just as we got into Jacksonville, the was a rainbow perfectly positioned over the city. Somehow I just knew my mom was going to be okay by seeing that rainbow. Later that night, around 9 P.M. my mom was out of surgery, and the surgeon told us "it couldn't have gone better." The stroke left her completely paralyzed on the left side. She stayed in the hospital two weeks, I never left her side. After the left the hospital it was a series of rehabilitation hospitals, I visited her every weekend. She came home the day after Thanks giving. I was her primary care giver, I put my life on hold, so that I could keep my mom out of a nursing home and take care of her, at home.

August 16th, 2016 - My mother suffered a second massive stroke. She was once again flown to Jacksonville to her surgeon. I was told "The bleed is significant, her brain is very swollen, and has shifted positions. I can operate to save her life, but she will never been the state she was in prior." Prior to the second stroke she was confined to a wheelchair, or sitting/laying down most of the day. He continued, "I want you to think of what she would want, If I operate, her quality of life will be very poor. She will most likely be bed ridden for the rest of her life. She may never speak, or open her eyes again. We can make her comfortable..." I made the decision to take my mom off of the ventilator, and have her pass peacefully.

August 18th, 2016 - My mother passed away peacefully with my brother and myself on each side.

I miss her terribly each day. I wish it could have be different. But I know my mom wouldn't have wanted that surgery. The surgeries terrified her. She struggled with anxiety and depression after her first stroke. I talked to her until the moment every indication of life was gone. I still talk to her. I have a journal, I write to her when I get upset.

I know she's better now, and when I see her again she wont be in that wheelchair, she won't be in pain, she won't be anxious, depressed, or scared.

She was my best friend. I was a complete mommas boy. I love her so much.

Stay strong. I mean it. If you need anything, if you need to talk, vent, anything, I'm here. Your mom loves you. She's watching you. She's with you wherever you go, and whatever you do. Make her proud.

EDIT: I apologize for some spelling and grammar errors. This was emotional.

I'm here for You bro all the way

Makenna wrote

So let me start of by introducing my self. My name is Christien. I'm 18 years old. About 2 months ago I woke up around 11am and walking in my moms room because that's where my dog was and I was gonna take him out. My mother was still sleeping which I found odd because she usually wakes up around 8am. The thing that bothered me though was how she was laying. Here head was dropped down as if she was looking at her toes and her arms were sprawled out as if she was making a snow angel. I tried yelling her name and no response. I grabbed her arm and even tried to shake her thinking it would wake her up. I almost pulled her out of bed and still no respond. I checked her blood pressure and that appeared to be fine and then I checked her blood sugar and it was 23 which is extremely low. Turns out she went into a coma. Its been about 2 months and shes been kinda coming back but then just hit a wall and stopped. She will open her eyes and follow you, cry every once in a while, but she cant do stuff on command very often like squeeze your hand. About a week ago, its like she woke up and tried strangling my step dad. It came out of nowhere. She also said clear as day "I don't Understand", And " I hurt", so we thought omg shes talking so I went to go visit and she didn't recognize me at all. She didn't say anything while I was there but I gave her a kiss and started to walk out and she put her finger up and said wait. Ever since Friday, shes been pretty much back to not talking. I Know everyone handles things differently but my mom was my best friend. I never had to go through anything like this and my mom is only 43. Shes too young for all thins. Now when this first happened, I didn't visit her in the hospital because I was always too scared to see her like that. The doctors had a meeting with me and my family when it happened and they gave us a choice, "Pull the plug and let her die peacefully" or "Keep her on life support and see if she wakes up" After all, She did have MODORATE brain damage. Keep in mind her brain can come back on she can be completely back to normal, But its just a waiting game and each day that goes by, its least likely she will recover. Now this is really hard for me and ive never had to go though any of this so if anyone can give me some advice, that would be great!


PS: I know this is very personal and its a lot but I felt I needed to tell the whole story and see if anyone had been through the same thing and could give me there advice

Update:

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She started to have bleeding on her brain last night and that caused her to go into an unconscious state. Doctors said they could do surgery to fix the bleeding but there would only be a 40% Chance she would make it through and even if she did, they said she would likely have a poor quality of life afterwards meaning she wouldn't be able to talk or open her eyes and she would basically be on life support. As a family we decided to pull the plug and let her pass peacefully. Thanks for everyones support.

Rest In Peace Mom. 12/23/71 - 1/2/16

A Year Later

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So here I am almost a year after she passed away. Its hard AF TBH still. No matter what people will tell you, They will not understand the pain and agony you go through until they experience the death of there mother as well. Yea, Some people can relate because they lost someone but not many can relate to losing their mother. The person who gave them life. Ill be honest, Losing her is the hardest thing ive ever had to experience in my 20 years of life. But I will tell you one thing, it made me grow up. And realise who my real friends are. I had people I haven't talked to in years message me on facebook telling me they were sorry for the loss of my mother yet I have people I called my best friends not even text me back or call me. I also learned to take nobody for granted. Anything can happen in an instant. Someone can say they are gonna call you back and 2 Min later, They are gone. Over the past 10 months, Ive had a Tattoo designed for my mother that I plan on getting. Gotta wear your heart on your sleeve right?! I recently was diagnosed with PTSD From finding my mother pretty much gone.
Now something I forgot to mention, I visited her on her birthday Dec 23rd and at the time, She was starting to alk again. Not totally making since at times but I kept asking her as she looked around laying in the hospital bed. "Mom, Please talk to me. Please, I just want to here your voice!" And for the first time in 3 Months, out of no where clear as day she told me she loved me 3 Times in a row with biggest smile on her face. Those were the last words I heard from her

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X-23 wrote

I'm 22.

September 4th, 2015 - My mom wakes up complaining of a terrible headache. My mom and I brush this off, as migraines run in our family. Later in the day, I took my mom to get my brother prescriptions. When we got to the pharmacy my mom opened the door to get out, she took one step out and froze. I said "momma", nothing. A little louder "momma, what's wrong?" Her reply "I just feel weird". By this point I knew something was wrong. I told her "If you don't get back into the truck, I'm going to call 911". As soon as I said this, someone my mom worked with pulled in next to is, she acknowledged my mom, and instantly knew something was wrong. She picked my mom up and put her in the truck. By this point my mother was slouched over on her left side. All I could think to say was "Momma, I love you", as I drove to the E.R. she responded "I love you too". We got her to the E.R. I waited what seemed like hours, which was only minutes for a security guard to come and get me. I followed him, and I could tell it wasn't good with how quickly he was moving. He escorted me to the trauma unit, where a doctor came from behind a curtained room, walked directly to me and said "Your mother has had a massive stroke." My world fell apart, he told me "That a doctor in Jacksonville, Fla., had accepted her as a patient. The helicopter is on it's was now, I suggest you start heading to Jacksonville." I absolutely refused to leave that hospital until my mom was on the helicopter. Seeing my mom on the ventilator was terrifying. I held her hand, and talked to her, my forehead against hers until the helicopter crew came to take her away. The nurses, brother, and myself prayed before the crew left.

On our way to Jacksonville, it stormed. Just as we got into Jacksonville, the was a rainbow perfectly positioned over the city. Somehow I just knew my mom was going to be okay by seeing that rainbow. Later that night, around 9 P.M. my mom was out of surgery, and the surgeon told us "it couldn't have gone better." The stroke left her completely paralyzed on the left side. She stayed in the hospital two weeks, I never left her side. After the left the hospital it was a series of rehabilitation hospitals, I visited her every weekend. She came home the day after Thanks giving. I was her primary care giver, I put my life on hold, so that I could keep my mom out of a nursing home and take care of her, at home.

August 16th, 2016 - My mother suffered a second massive stroke. She was once again flown to Jacksonville to her surgeon. I was told "The bleed is significant, her brain is very swollen, and has shifted positions. I can operate to save her life, but she will never been the state she was in prior." Prior to the second stroke she was confined to a wheelchair, or sitting/laying down most of the day. He continued, "I want you to think of what she would want, If I operate, her quality of life will be very poor. She will most likely be bed ridden for the rest of her life. She may never speak, or open her eyes again. We can make her comfortable..." I made the decision to take my mom off of the ventilator, and have her pass peacefully.

August 18th, 2016 - My mother passed away peacefully with my brother and myself on each side.

I miss her terribly each day. I wish it could have be different. But I know my mom wouldn't have wanted that surgery. The surgeries terrified her. She struggled with anxiety and depression after her first stroke. I talked to her until the moment every indication of life was gone. I still talk to her. I have a journal, I write to her when I get upset.

I know she's better now, and when I see her again she wont be in that wheelchair, she won't be in pain, she won't be anxious, depressed, or scared.

She was my best friend. I was a complete mommas boy. I love her so much.

Stay strong. I mean it. If you need anything, if you need to talk, vent, anything, I'm here. Your mom loves you. She's watching you. She's with you wherever you go, and whatever you do. Make her proud.

EDIT: I apologize for some spelling and grammar errors. This was emotional.