#11. Posted:
Ryuk
  • Winter 2017
Status: Offline
Joined: Feb 11, 20144 Year Member
Posts: 806
Reputation Power: 205
Gnarcotic wroteGot stopped by a guy asking for directions whilst I was talking on the phone. The disrespect, I told him where to go.


Wizard wrote
My wife just found out I replaced our bed with a trampoline; she hit the roof.


You two are the firsts to make me chuckle, well done.
#12. Posted:
dah
  • Download King +
Status: Online
Joined: Jan 26, 20162 Year Member
Posts: 10,816
Reputation Power: 1532
Motto: I'm a Youtuber over 2K Subs. https://www.youtube.com/dahdahs
"I never forgot a face, but in your case I'd be glad to make a exception" - Groucho Marx
#13. Posted:
MEMlS
  • Winter 2016
Status: Offline
Joined: Apr 29, 20162 Year Member
Posts: 1,361
Reputation Power: 269
I wonder if illiterate people get the full effect of alphabet soup
#14. Posted:
Status: Offline
Joined: Nov 28, 20143 Year Member
Posts: 636
Reputation Power: 44
I cant move, breathe, speak or hear and its so dark all the time. If I knew it would be this lonely, I would have been cremated instead.
#15. Posted:
Status: Offline
Joined: Jun 24, 20116 Year Member
Posts: 287
Reputation Power: 35
Whiteboards are remarkable!
#16. Posted:
Status: Offline
Joined: Aug 08, 2017
Posts: 100
Reputation Power: 20
I have two:

We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
#17. Posted:
Status: Offline
Joined: Jul 06, 20134 Year Member
Posts: 479
Reputation Power: 45
wanna know the difference between jelly and jam?
#18. Posted:
Status: Offline
Joined: Aug 10, 20152 Year Member
Posts: 39
Reputation Power: 2
If I was a squirrel would you help me bust a nut?
#19. Posted:
Status: Offline
Joined: Aug 26, 20143 Year Member
Posts: 290
Reputation Power: 16
Hey, you look pretty freaking stupid
#20. Posted:
Fibril
  • Shoutbox Hero
Status: Offline
Joined: Aug 17, 20116 Year Member
Posts: 2,728
Reputation Power: 687
I've noticed that everyone who is for abortion, has already been born.
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