My only motivation is my daughter, nothing else really matters when you're gifted a opportunity of a life time

Shit gets rough dude, happens to everyone at some point in life, some worse than others though in your case,

When I went through some of my psychotic episodes, when I was 17/18, last yearish, games and my girlfriend was all I had

Then I realised mixing my girlfriend and video games made things a whole lot more fun,

I'm not going to lie, you sound like you're disconnected from the support of your family, I fortunately am still supported by my family, so it must be tough on you do and I feel for you

If you want to talk to someone about whatever just shoot me a PM I'll always reply